Tranquility
by WarriorMaiden13
Summary: <html><head></head>Two months. Two months, since Marian Hawke had disappeared leaving her companions worried and fearful for her. What happened to their Hawke? One-Shot. [FemHawkeXFenris]</html>


She was gone. For two months his heart and soul had been missing and the days were only becoming even more unbearable. There sitting in Varric's room in the Hanged Man they all have come trying to pull their knowledge and contacts together to find their missing leader. Slouched back in his chair just clutching his mug, Fenris stared down into the chocolate water gazing at himself begging to see the woman he craved so dearly. No one dared to speak or break the heavy silence that rested on all of their shoulders and room.

To his left sat Aveline her hands holding up her head as her elbows rested against the wooden surface of the table. On her left sat Merrill who seemed to be interested in a painting that hung right above Varric's bed but they all knew she was thinking about her missing friend. The only other person there was Isabela who sat across from Fenris not daring to crack a joke or even smile. No jokes or smiles could fill the void that their friend left. Finally after several minutes like that the door opened and Anders entered the room alone to grab everyone's attention for a moment before he sat beside Fenris neither of which had the energy nor desire to argue like old times.

"…So I am guessing from the silence no one has come up with anything?" The red head finally dared to speak after Ander's entrance. Sighing deeply Isabela brushed over the thick weaved bracelet containing bright inlet colors of red, gold, and blue…the one Hawke gave her.

"None… all my friends have scoured the decks of ships for months. She did not get on a boat or I would have heard about it. Even my contacts from the cities in Free Marsh have produced nothing." A small yet harsh grunt came from the male mage as he scratched at the table seeming to be lost in thought.

"It is not that I don't believe you, Isabela. But it is really hard for me to believe that no one could _not_ notice the Champion of Kirkwall." The tanned beauty sat back against her seat and she sighed rubbing her temples very much agreeing with him but yet she still could not fins any trace of her.

"Don't blame yourself Isabela…I have gotten just as much as you…" The female elf now spoke up catching everyone's eyes, but Fenris, as she continued to stare at the painting. "My clan has scoured the caves and even asked other clans if they have spotted H….Hawke…but nothing…" This news was just getting worse and worse which only made the male elf to tighten his grip around his mug further and further as they continued.

"Still no report from the guards of seeing her…the city is as desperate to find her…I got a letter from Carver the other day." Aveline was the one who spoke now and everyone, even Fenris, looked to her eyes hoping and praying even though they knew it was fruitless. "Even with all the power and authority that he possess he has no evidence of Hawke there in Ferelden …but I doubt she could get to Ferelden without Isabela not knowing about it." Large painful sighs left them all as they shrunk further into their sadness before Aveline turned her gaze to Anders. "You get anything?" He simply shook his head and they all looked down in defeat until Anders finally….voiced all their fears.

"I…I don't think that there is anything more to find of her…" Immediately the elf slammed his mug onto the table with such force that it shook the table and spilled alcohol everywhere. Standing up Fenris grasped the front of the mage's robes lifting him off the ground spitting angrily.

"Don't. Fucking. Say. That." Everyone stood ready to break up a fight that they were sure that would ensue but Anders did not argue nor did he fight back.

"Fenris…" The mage said softly as the elf flared angrily feeling his blood boil madly. Sizzling and coursing through him like fire just wanting nothing more than to squeeze the life out of the mage, until that sad, pathetic face was nothing more than blank fear. But soon that anger disappeared and faded with the thoughts of Hawke stopping their fights telling them not to kill each other. Dropping the male and stood there for a moment before his brow furrowed now turning from them all.

"I need some air." Walking with brisk pace the others let the Tevinter elf leave the hanged man. Pushing through the crowds that filled the main hall of the Hanged Man, Fenris no longer cared if her pushed people over or spilled their drinks. He needed the cool embrace of the night sky to kiss his skin and cool the pain that was etched in his face, eyes, and soul.

Mind spinning and crying out for his black haired beauty he slammed the door open and was greeted by a thick blanket of rain. This did not phase the elf…It only added to that cool embrace he craved so dearly. He did not want to feel the warmth or caress of anything unless it was Hawke's. Those warm fingertips dragging across his lyrium tattoos easing the pain that would be felt by such contact. Pale skin pressing against his tanned skin contrasting in such a beautiful and wonderful way giving sensations that he had never felt before. Oh how he missed how she would whisper his name in his ear before biting into his ear lobe expression such a playful mood. Oh how he missed her…

Walking the empty streets of low town that no doubt contained hidden thieves, slavers, brawlers, or any other kind of danger hidden in the dark he dared them to attack him in such a state. But alas none showed their face to him and his walk up to the much nicer, stone streets of high town as he made his way towards his mansion. Grunting absently at the cold rain that caused his white hairs to cling to his face and neck. Each drop of water moved over his scaled armor before it sunk into the cracks tasting his skin and undergarments in a cold embrace. Shivering in response to this cold he could not help but think to snuggling next to Hawke in front of a fire on a night just like this.

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><p><em>"Oh come on now... I might be a mage but you can't blame the rain on me!" The female wrapped in a thick wool blanket beamed up at the elf as he proceeded to take off his armor. Turning his gaze to the woman, who sat in front of the fire place on the floor, with a raised brow he scoffed before retorting.<em>

_"No. But I can blame you for wanting to take the long way back here when we both knew it was going to rain." Remaining still for a moment he could clearly see her wheels turning trying to come up with a snappy comeback but instead her face fell into annoyance as she huffed looking from him. His lips expanded into a smirk at his victory over the very stubborn woman but this left him time to gaze over her. Her short, boy cut hair that swept to one side was considered improper for a lady to posses...but then again proper women don't kill for money. Everything about her was anything but normal. High cheek bones that only accented her icy blue eyes that seemed too bright to be human, but yet showed so much emotion. Her face showed nothing but strength and power; jaw, eyes, brow, set of her lips. Her neck was nothing less of that air of strength...but oh how it called to him to bruise and claim in it's pale canvas. _

_But despite all this power and strength behind her features she had delicate frame. Soft swept contours of her hips and shoulders showed no real power or muscle. The blanket that clung to her body fell off one shoulder revealing a portion of her shoulder and back that was nothing but...doll like. Her skin shined like porcelain fragile and breakable. Now just in damp under clothes the elf moved towards her his hand gently caressed that exposed shoulder causing the woman to gently jump at the sudden contact._

_"Fenris?" Hawke's piercing blue gaze now stared at him swimming with a fiery passion for him. Every time. Every fucking time she looked at him so his walls came down and he desired nothing more than...her._

_"Hush." He soothed quietly as his lips found her neck now kissing that ample skin lovingly and softly just basking in her, everything about her._

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><p>Before he knew it...there he was. At her empty mansion. He was so lost in his memories of her that he had gone to the one place he dreaded to go. Staring up into the dark and empty windows the elf felt an all too familiar rush of pain fill his being and heart. A pain that was more crushing than any physical pain he had endured. How he wished he had not been so foolish and selfish to deny the love and passion they both shared because of his pain. If he could he would go back and endure whatever amount of pain just to hold her... to kiss those lips and tell her that he loved her. Something he never was able to do.<p>

_Come back to me, Marian. _His thoughts echoed dully in his mind just waiting for a response that was impossible to receive. Standing there in the rain for minutes maybe an hour, he didn't know, he finally let his head fall and turn to return to his ghastly mansion. Turning around immediately his lowered gaze caught the sight of feet behind him and his warrior instincts snapped alive and he jumped backwards his sword drawn. But...

Every thing stopped in world. His mind, body, and heart stopped dropping his sword right on the ground with an echoing impact. He couldn't believe it. _Oh my god...I c-can't believe it...__  
><em>

"...M-Marian?" His voice was that of complete and utter shock as there standing before him was the very woman that never left his thoughts. Standing in black threads with her once short boyish hair now to her shoulders as she stared at him with those unique blue eyes of hers. But as soon as he froze he was moving towards her grasping her forearms his eyes dashing around her features. He smiled his eyes lighting up until he watched her reaction... there was none. Tilting her head up to look into Fenris's eyes he was appalled to see nothing in her eyes; no emotion, passion or even thoughts. This hit him so hard as he searched her face for something. "Marian? What is wrong? Where have you been?! What happened to you?!" He asked more and more questions, each one coming out more desperate as his hands squeezed her tighter and tighter wanting something from her.

"Fenris." That was it. His eyes flashed utter despair as he heard her voice come out in no spirit, perkiness, or even pain. There was nothing in her voice but stoic expression. He shook his head quickly as his hand reached up to her forehead brushing away those soft, silky strands of black until he saw it. The mark of the tranquil.

"...no...no... Marian...I am...s-so sorry...no." His body, his heart fell into a pain that was of nothing before. He had her here but she was dead and gone from this world as far as he was considered. His lip quivered and for the first time in this entire months tears rolled down his cheeks as he pressed his forehead against that blasted sun marking on her forehead crying softly. "Marian. Come back to me."

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><p><strong>Well I am going to go cry in a corner now. Why the hell I wrote this I don't know but it is a one-shot that I may very well continue on later.<strong>

**I got other projects so I will attend to them and may return to this because this ending is even unsatisfying to me.**

**~Dani**


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